“People smile and tell me I’m the lucky one, And we’ve just begun, Think I’m gonna have a son, He will be like she and me, as free as a dove, Conceived in love, Sun is gonna shine above” – Danny’s Song

Today is the anniversary of my introduction to motherhood.  It was a sunny, spring morning in Stillwater, Oklahoma when Nolan Robert Hildebrand made his entrance into the world.  A last minute scheduled C section, who knew this eight and half pound baby boy would teach us so much over the next thrity-three years.

I have written about my daughters and celebrated their milestones across the digital airwaves.  Primary because sometime in Kayla’s mid teens she decided that birthday week should be a “thing” and I gladly obliged.  Daily treats and posts showcasing all things fabulous about Kayla and Lilly lined my social media account in March and October annually.  Yet, Nolan’s yearly birthday somehow missed these festivities, quietly resting in my writer’s mind waiting for a time to shine.  Today is that day.

I am beyond grateful for my three children.  They each bring love and light into the world in their own uniquely, special way.  Yet, Nolan does hold the title of being the first born.  He gave me the gift of being a mom.  Our early days together found me navigating my way through grad school with a baby stroller.  I often wondered if he would be a gifted math student for the hours of early absorption of economics.  Looking back, my scholastic journey was nothing compared to the education that my brown eyed son has afforded me over the last three decades.

Nolan’s natural tendencies were apparent at an early age.  His big heart, concentration ability, storage of facts and knack to charm a stranger, God granted him these traits in his core.  Leaning into my classroom techniques, allow me to impart the lessons learned from my boy.

Unconditional love is day one in the parenthood syllabus.  Having a child turns a switch on inside of a person that defies explanation.  You feel more for another human than you could ever measure or easily place into words.  But life with Nolan takes the topic to another level.  Watching him protect, nurture, cheer and express love for his two sisters is a study onto itself.  He gives his heart freely with no mercy to others who get in his way.  They are two humans that will never have to worry if someone has their back, their big brother has that job covered for life.

As a small child Nolan began to flex his tremendous skill of having a never-ending memory.  From knowing every type of whale or dinosaur to recalling random sports trivia, believe me his brain has unlimited space to store facts for future recollection.  Yes, I wondered if recalling every breed of hog at age five for “show and tell” was really necessary, but he has taught me that this trait can lead to amazing opportunities.  As a coach and mentor of young people, eliciting past situations, such as that one class of crossbred market hogs from five years ago, is a special skill. Having a knack to communicate the facts like they were happening in the moment is truly a talent.  My memory stores large amounts of data, but I am not near as proficient as my son.

Life can be serious business.  My son has taught me the importance of injecting a little fun into each and every job.   Just like Mary Poppins when she cleverly persuades Jane and Micheal to tidy up the nursery.  “In every job that must be done, there is an element of Fun, you find the Fun and snap and the job’s a game”, perfectly describes Nolan’s production mind set.   Did you know that when the kids showed, there was always a football tucked into the tack box just in case a pop-up game needed to be scrimmaged?  From funny voices, nick names, and made-up games, entertainment needs to be part of the chore process.  Dr. Mafi probably was delighted when a sidetracked meat student turned a piece of fat into a hacky sack during a judging workout.  Even when he was trying to sell me on a concept (the time he wanted to build a pond in the backyard) he presented me a Power Point with all the activities we would enjoy as a family from this body of water.  And of course, he thought his sisters could just dig this hole with a couple of shovels.

This leads me to his unfaltering ability to dream.  And dream big.  Not the head in the clouds form of dreaming, but full visualization of the outcome already in play.  Before I ever heard of the book The Secret and the law of attraction, a young Nolan Hildebrand was showcasing this talent.  Countless times he would tell me how a situation was going to play out and low and behold his belief drew in the outcome.  There was the time that he told me how his football team would win a big game.  He imagined that they would be underdogs, but in the final seconds they would score and be victorious.  Guess what, first game of his senior year Taft High School came to town.  The game began as a one-sided grudge match with Templeton High School not holding the winning hand.  But after a reworking of the game plan the tide began to turn.  As the clock ticked down to the final seconds, they kicked a field goal to win the game. Imagine that?

Although his dreaming and unwavering beliefs have worried me for fear of his disappointment, I marvel at his steadfast approach to this discipline.  Secretly I wish he applied his mind to work this way more often.  From sending me the a photo of a lamb nursing his mom, and announcing he found his Grand Champion Market Lamb for California State Fair (and yes the lamb won) to proclaiming that five freshmen who would anchor his livestock judging team one season would all be crowned All American’s (they were), Nolan’s ability for attracting into reality his dreams is one of his most special gifts. 

With an unlimited imagination and an uncanny belief system, the boy who loves to have fun, I would note focus as his number one signature strength.  The baby that would sit and watch Disney movies so I could study, the boy who’s competitive nature is legendary and the man who can play 54 holes of golf a day, my son has shown an unlimited ability to focus.  He has taught me that dedication to a task can be a motivator for success.  Time gets lost in Nolan’s world.  The prize at the end of path is the schedule keeper.  His achievements can all be traced back to his keen sense to stay the course. Even when I am at my wits end with his tardiness, he just smiles and assures me that everything will be alright. The subject at hand takes first priority and keeps his full attention.

The final chapter of the Nolan lesson plan is the universal study of nature vs nurture.  He has his father’s talent of working with his hands and his sharp sense of humor. Nolan has my emotional mindset and deep affection for music.  But his genetic markings run so much deeper.  His love of family and dedication to traditions stem from his Grandma Jo.  He also inherited that wicked Miller worry gene, sorry about that one.  From his mannerisms to his reciting of random movie lines reminds me of my brother John. The similarities between him and his god father do not stop there, he has never met a stranger and can carry on a conversation with ease with anyone, just like Johnny.  To say he takes after his grandfathers in an understatement.  His athletic skills and agriculture passions seem to be obvious, but I would argue a finer aptitude is present.  His ability to impact young people’s lives is right out of my Dad and Bob Cummings’ playbook.  In the classroom to the playing field, these men have encouraged generations of young people to be better versions of themselves.  Watching Nolan follow in their footsteps and eliminate this gift, fills my heart with immeasurable joy. But the true tutorial of nurture is the similarities of my son and my stepbrother CRC.  If you don’t believe me, just march them out to the barn and listen to them talk. Case closed.

Nolan may have been born on April Fools Day, but he is no ordinary fool.  He is an extraordinary human. Proud to call him my son, is such a canned phrased.  He is truly good in all the right places.  Winning the son class with a ten point cut. Having found the yin to his yang in Sierra, together there is no mountain they can’t climb. I can’t wait to see what he does in the next thirty-three years.  Rest assured  his next big accomplishment is just a dream away.

“And even though we ain’t got money
I’m so in love with you, honey
And everything will bring a chain of love, oh, oh, oh
In the morning, when I rise
You bring a tear of joy to my eyes
And tell me everything is gonna be alright”

Happy Birthday NRH – Love You to the Moon & Back